Monday, June 11th, 2007
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Monday
June 11th, 2007 at 11:01am
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hmm nmy last post was february 23 and a lot has happened
i saved up and bought a new car since i totaled my sunfire
senior prom was fun =)
i FINALLY graduated highschool. i wasn't even sad but it probably won't hit my until one of my best friends moves to new york the end of the summer
i've been out of school for over month
working at the crack of dawn everyday sucks
i miss alot of people.
i love my boyfriend
i love my friends
i'm so indecisive about my major next year
business
education
fitness specialist/education
idk any inputs would be nice.
i leave for school september 2 and i'm getting kind of nervous but i'm dorming with one oe my best friends which is comforting
i really want to have a good summer
oh and i changed my cell phone number so if you want it let me know!
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Friday, February 23rd, 2007
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Friday
February 23rd, 2007 at 9:22am
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sooooooo vacations almost over. and it sucked. not having a car has seriously put a damper on my life. im so used to being out doing something ALL THE TIME. and this has not been the case latley. i have $500 saved only $500 more until my dad will take me out looking for a new car@%#&^$&$%&^&#. when i get my car back im seeing people like KAYLA who is impossible to make plans with.
i also miss my boyfriend alot
i havent seen him alot latley.
=(
current music: sugah sugah how ya get soooo flyyyyyy
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Sunday, February 18th, 2007
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Sunday
February 18th, 2007 at 12:46pm
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i have a lot going thorough my head right now.
i took today off from work thinking it would be nice of me not to drag my parents out of bed early on a sunday morning and drive me to work. well after fighting with my mom all morning i remembered why i work all day saturday and sunday. i remember.. about a month ago when life was really good. everyday i had something new and exciting to do and i was always with my friends. well since my accident my social life has gone down the toilet and i spend more time in my room by myself then ever. i hate being home more than anything. i hate being alone even more. i hate the fact that i never see my friends etc. i feel like such a loser. i've been trying so hard not to spend any money and save as much as possible to get a new car. as of this monring i had $502. but now its pretty much gone. i feel like i work so hard and having nothing to show for it..
before today i wasnt sure if i wanted to move away next year. but now i know i want to leave. i want to get out of this house and i think time away from my mom and dad will be a good thing. im nervous about meeting new people and making new friends. but as long as i still have my 3 best friends and my boyfriend. i think im pretty much set
the only time ive really been happy is when im with steve. even though i havent been able to see him alot latley because hes so busy and always so tired. but thats ok. im lucky to even have him. i hope im a good girlfriend. im trying. he deserves a good girlfriend. hes so perfect to me
vacations this week im working monday 12-6, wed 7-3 friday 3-9 and saturday 7-3. so anytime im not at work. hang out with me
my birthdays a week from today. im not even excited.
i get to buy my own ciggerattes though
i was gonna quit that too
maybe well try that again next week.
current music: new found glory
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Tuesday, February 13th, 2007
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Tuesday
February 13th, 2007 at 9:28pm
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hmm soo. today kind of flew by. school. work. american idol. my life is so exciting now a days. there needs to be a fucking snow day tomorrow because i didnt do an oounce of homework tonight and i have 2 big things do tomorrow woops.
and tomorrows like my favroite holiday ever. VALENTINES DAY. i hate that holiday. i dont even know why i hate it so much. its not like i wouldnt have someone to spend it with cuz i do. i just think if you love someone you love them 365 days a year and not just february 14th. am i wrong? cuz an 80 year old woman told me i was nuts when i told her how i felt about valentines day oh well
school vacation starts friday
not to excited
no car
hopefully working a shitload
drive to whitman and come get me
it will make me extremley happy.
goodnight =)
current music: new found glory
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Sunday, February 11th, 2007
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Sunday
February 11th, 2007 at 9:14pm
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i am in the worst mood right now and feel so miserable and so lonley. i hate my life right now hate it. with the exception of maybe 2 of my friends and my boyfriend i want nothing to do with any of you. i hate having friends. it always ends up being a huge disappointment. people are so selfish. i feel like im there for everyone and no one can return me th favor. and for the past 2 weeks my social life has gone down the drain because i dont have a car.no one will come get me.. and no one will drive here to come hang out with me. ive been sitting around alone doing nothing. sweet. i turn 18 in 2 weeks and i really could care less.
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Sunday, February 4th, 2007
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Sunday
February 4th, 2007 at 7:29pm
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this has been the most miserable week of my life. finally after 3 days of being in pain i went to the emergency room to get checked out. all i had was really bad whip lash but since i waited so long to get pills for it im gonna be in pain longer than i should. i was out of school monday-thursday and all i did was fucking cry. crying can sometimes relieve alot of stress and make you feel better.. but i was crying so much i was getting annoyed with myself. ive been doing better the past couple days. and this past week has made me realize how much i really love my boyfriend. hes been there for me more than anyone in my life has. and im so grateful to have someone care about me this much and stay up with me all night while i cry and just be absoloutly amazing. im so unmotivated for school. i hate school i hate every aspect of it. i want to graduate now. and as for college right now.. im still up in the air on what i want to do. i dont know..
i turn 18 in 2 weeks and considering my last 2 birthdays have sucked beyond belief i hope i have a halfway decent one this year
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Sunday, January 28th, 2007
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Sunday
January 28th, 2007 at 12:18pm
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I am so sorry. I am so sorry for all of this. i would never do anything intentionally to jepordize my friends lives. i wish it was me in the hospital right now and not you. i wish i was the one getting surgery and not you. i wish sometthing bad happened to me and you guys were fine. i felt so guilty last night. your lying in a hospital in pain.. im cuddled up in bed with my boy okay. it should have been the other way around. i would do anything to take your pain away and put it on me.
you know you truley have a best friend. when you walk into the er...shes strapped to a bed in pain.. and the first thing she does is look up and ask YOU if your okay.
i love you jessica.
im so sorry guys. im so fucking sorry.
.....someone please tell me this is just a bad dream
current music: not snoop dog
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Monday, January 22nd, 2007
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Monday
January 22nd, 2007 at 2:56pm
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my happy mood hasn't changed since last week. in fact i think i've gotten happier. latley ive realized who my true friends are and i love it. its so nice to know i have someone to call up ad ramble on about stupid shit and they will listen. saturday me and jessica FINALLY hung out. it was so nice i missed her so much and it felt like we picked up right where we left off. its deffinitly not going to be another year before we hang out again. kaileigh came and hung out with us for a littlr bit too and i think the three of us are hanging out on saturday. i love how my 4 cloest girlfriends are all in seprate groups of people.. but i can bring them together to hang out. its awesome. oh and i love steve and hes about 90% of the reason im always in such a good mood. hes way to good to me. and i probably dont deserve this at all. and i wont do anything to screw this one up. i promise.
im gonna go shower and do some homework and hopefully see my boy when he gets home from school!!!$@%@
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Monday, January 15th, 2007
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Monday
January 15th, 2007 at 1:11pm
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so i'm pretty content with the way my life is going. i've realized that i have the 3 best friends in the entire world and i really dont need any other friends besides them. and i have this amazing boy in my life too<33
this week is going to be pretty easy
today im relaxing and studying for my history midterm
tuesday- history exam until 9
wedndsay- math exam until 11 then out to lunch with jessica who i havent hung out with in forever and im so excited cuz i miss her oh so very much! then hanging out with kaileigh wednsday night
thursday- work 6-12 then im free so lets hang out
friday-work till1 2 then hanging out with my boy :)
no school. thank god.
ps.
i also hate seeing one of my best friends so upset. ukwur. i love you. keep your head up. im here for you babe. well get through this
<3
current music: senses fail
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Friday, January 12th, 2007
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Friday
January 12th, 2007 at 6:52am
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Saturday, January 6th, 2007
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Saturday
January 6th, 2007 at 12:08am
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what made my day amazing.
finally getting my car back
running into kayla in bobs, who i havent seen in what feels like a year
new sweatpants
adam forkey
my awesome friends
smelling like a fireplace
and my unbelievbly amazing boy<333
oh and my pb&j sandwhich abd bbq chips!!
current music: treos
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Tuesday, January 2nd, 2007
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Tuesday
January 2nd, 2007 at 11:42pm
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this is so perfect
and to good for me
i haven't been this happy in a really long time
current music: incubus
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Monday, January 1st, 2007
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Monday
January 1st, 2007 at 2:02pm
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so overall 2006 fucking blowed. in about every possible way. im hoping 2007 will be alot better. maybe find some halfway decent friends, turn 18, go to college, get the fuck out of here.
but new years eve was so much fun!! i went to alicias with mike his friend julie katie and michaela and we drank... correction.. i did most of the drinking and it was just a wicked fun low key night with no drama and people i love. there should be more nights like that. im actually in a decent mood right now for a change. just wicked fucking tired. so i think im gonna go take a shower and take a nap.
ps.
any friends of mine that have for whatever reason walked out of my life this pass year. i suggest you walk in because chances are i do miss you.
current music: saves the day
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Monday, December 4th, 2006
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Monday
December 4th, 2006 at 9:38pm
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lifes been going pretty good
cant complain
oh except for the fact that i got in a sweet car accident on the highway friday night and need a new hood and a a new headlight
and i fell down a flight of stairs friday night
sweet life
schools sucks. i hate everyone there
still working a shitlaod
alicia and julie and people friday nights
and janelle and whoever on saturday
nothing big.
but if your reading this chances are i miss you and we should hang out asap.
and people who are supposed to be my friends should probably call me once in awhile
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Tuesday, October 24th, 2006
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Tuesday
October 24th, 2006 at 7:09pm
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these past 48 hours have been the worst 2 days of my life. im not gonna post about what happened cuz im sure theres people who read this thing who i dont fucking like/ knowing my business
but i want to move out in february when i turn 18. who wants to get an apaprtment with me because believe it or not i can afford one.
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Sunday, October 22nd, 2006
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Sunday
October 22nd, 2006 at 7:59pm
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it seems like everyone my age goes through having their first love/ first relationship. they always seem to think they'll be together forever... get married.. everything is just perfect.. etc. but in the end that never happens. you end up absorbing your entire life with this person until one day it all falls apart and your miserable and you feel so alone.. you dedicate all your time to finding another person and another perfect relationship like the one you used to have. but all you do is fail. you try real hard to find someone who will out beat your old boyfriend/girlfriend.. but for some reason their face is always in the back of your head no matter how much you've fallen out of love with him/ her. i've gone through it. and now i see my friends going through it.
this doesn't really have any purpose
its just something ive been thinking about latley.
current music: plain white ts
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Monday, October 9th, 2006
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Monday
October 9th, 2006 at 7:20pm
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today was such a gorgeous day.
i slept over jesses last night. and today was the first day in months i actually got to sleep in. im usually up at 5 am every saturday and sunday for work. i hung out with grubbies and toni who i never see anymore. it was nice. then i picked jesse up from her boys house and we went to the brockton mall and met up with john dudge and steve. hung out. now im home procrastinating doing my homework..
its fall. i love fall. its so pretty. and nice and cool.
word of the wise..
..dont drink and drive.
current music: bullet for my valentine
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Saturday, October 7th, 2006
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Saturday
October 7th, 2006 at 12:15am
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i never update this thing anymore.
so my life has been decent latley. i go to school everyday and work 5-6 days a week. sweet life. im trying to work on quitting smoking and ive been doing pretty good the past couple of days. im proud of myself!. it seems to me that everyones been getting boyfriends/girlfriends latley. ive been single for 8 months. and i thought i liked being single. but im getting kind of tired of it. i kind of want a boyfriend. but a majority of boys suck and i dont trust them. ive learned not to let myself like anyone i shouldnt. and i dont expect anything from them at all. i dont feel like getting hurt. ive been trying to have a positive outlook on things latley. and ive been trying to be nicer. i think my time away from everything did be good. ive been a pretty happy person latley.
today was fun. i had no school i worked for a few hours. picked up kayla. we went to the al4w show in norwood. i made an ass out of myself a few times and made fun of some scene girl. than we went to romans and met up with people. drank a little bit. i had fun. and now im sitting here doing nothing and i should probably go to sleep since i have work at 7.
im out of work at 3 tomorrow so someone should probably hang out with me!!!
oh and i love jesse manison more than you
current music: taking back sunday
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Tuesday, September 19th, 2006
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Tuesday
September 19th, 2006 at 7:46pm
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i really feel like i have lost all of my friends
someone please tell me this isnt true.
current music: transistor transistor
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Saturday, September 16th, 2006
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Saturday
September 16th, 2006 at 2:08pm
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i have probably become the most miserable 17 year old girl you have ever met in your life
..seriously..
nothing in my life is going right. i havent seen my friends in almost 3 weeks.. not like to many of them probably care. and i hate my family.
thats all.
current music: breather resist
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